It takes a great deal of patience to parent. Either you’ve already come equipped with the attribute, or you acquire the skill after a few years of surviving toddler-dom.
Being the mother of a 10-year-old and a 3-year-old is no doubt rewarding, but there’s only so much gentle reminding one can give. Patience, additionally, extends beyond waiting with bated breath for them to do-it-themselves; it’s allowing your child room to grow, to experience tough obstacles, to learn to speak up for themselves, and to endure with them tough conversations.
For instance, conversations with our children have involved topics on homelessness, poverty, death, trauma, anti-Semitism and racism. My husband and I intend for our boys to grasp racism and bigotry, most importantly. It’s something that I, Niimipu, and raised in the community of the Confederated Tribes and Bands of the Yakama Nation, and many others in our communities, have endured for decades, and unfortunately, it’s important not just for their growth but also for their survival.
In November, we give special attention to the first people of this nation during Native American Heritage Month. Albeit every month is Native Heritage Month for me, my family, and my community, but for those who are not blessed with exposure to Native communities, keep reading for a number of resources.
Beyond participating in the many events around the city, I encourage you to learn more about the Native people. Further, I encourage you to engage in what might be tough conversations with your family, your child’s school, and other non-Native people in your community. There are plenty of resources to guide you and below is some information to help you get started.
The Thanksgiving narrative
First, let’s talk about Thanksgiving. You may have heard that Native folks aren’t keen on the holiday, and that’s for good reason. One, the story you’ve been told is likely an inaccurate rendition. Two, this holiday regurgitates stereotypical depictions of Native people while trivializing our central role in American history. For a truer history on the Thanksgiving narrative, see this article from NPR. For more balanced and historically accurate approaches to teaching the Thanksgiving story, advise your children’s teachers to visit here and here; and, lastly, share this curriculum introduced by the late John McCoy through the Senate.
The miseducation of Thanksgiving is a prime (but sadly not the only) example of how our school systems have failed our children, not just Native children, but everyone. Native American history is American history, and as families and schools, if we don’t teach history from a balanced and accurate perspective, we prolong suffering and avoid the necessary and overdue healing process.
As you read more about the true history of Thanksgiving, you’ll discover it’s not the same tale of pilgrims and Indians you learned in grade school. Although historical interpretations vary, a consistent theme emerging is the impact of colonization—a force that continues to shape and, in many cases, endanger Indigenous cultures and ways of life. We ought to raise children who draw wisdom from diverse stories, particularly those that have been suppressed.
Further, there is much to learn from common Native core values: such as reverence for elders, sharing of wealth, family values, respect and relationship to our natural environment, protection of our natural environment, and healthy ways of living through indigenous foods and medicine, to name a few.
Racism and stereotypes
Misinformation and stereotypical images of Native people are harmful. This not only erases the contemporary contributions of Native people, it fuels ignorant and racist behavior. Statistically, Native people are among the highest population disproportionately affected by almost any negative socioeconomic indicators. For instance, there are high disproportionate rates of incarcerated Native people, high incidences of police brutality against Native people, high rates of violence against Native women and children, there is an epidemic of youth suicide and inadequate health care, to name a few. In addition, many Tribal communities continue to face the destruction of their traditional lands.
For Native people, this month, and every month, we celebrate the beauty of our culture as well as the generations of survival, perseverance, and self-determination. We honor our elders who have paved the way and held on to our traditions, which guide us and keep us healthy. This month, we also celebrate Native activists, scholars, lawyers, physicians, athletes, scientists, musicians, artists, authors, entrepreneurs, philanthropists, and protectors of our natural environment. We celebrate that we are still here, building stronger communities despite historical circumstances.
There are so many in my community putting in tough work. Please consider giving your dollars to the various organizations: United Indians of All Tribes Foundation, Seattle Indian Health Board, the Chief Seattle Club, Urban Native Education Alliance, Na’ah Illahee Fund, wǝɫǝbʔaltxʷ House at the University of Washington, Mother Nation, and Huy to name a few.
More about Native people and tribes:
- Nationally, there are more than 500 tribal groups represented within the United States, and each tribal nation is diverse in tradition, custom and language.
- Within the boundaries of what is now Washington State, there are more than 29 tribal nations.
- Tribes are sovereign nations, much like federal and state governments, and have inherent rights to access traditional resources. Treaties, secured within the U.S. Constitution, ensure that tribes maintain these rights.
- Natives serve in the military at the highest rate of any ethnic group.
- Tribes of Washington are both economically large and beneficial to the non-Indian public interest. Tribes contribute via in-kind services, indirect tax collections, and millions in direct contributions to public charities and government agencies. Further, WA Tribes are ranked among the top 15 employers of WA State.
Some other tips:
- Don’t assume how Native people should look, dress, or act; we are diverse people.
- Never ask a Native person their “blood” quantum, or how much “Indian” they are. It’s weird.
- Traditional Native attire is worn for special occasions; avoid Halloween costumes and other wear that trivializes who we are.
- Seek out children’s books (or any book) that depict contemporary Native people (and are written or illustrated by Native people).
- Attend public Native community events and gatherings. The more you hang out with our community, the more likely you’re exposed to our witty humor and amazing cuisine.
Updated from the 2019 article.
