When Abby and Jason Low got married in May 2005, they didn’t foresee that the next 20 years would encompass infertility, adoption, biological births, an interstate relocation to Washington, and foster parenting. But over the years, the family’s Christian faith and spirit of service have meant opening their hearts and home — their family now includes five kids.
The Lows adopted their eldest, 14-year-old Micah, when he was 2 weeks old after about three years of trying to conceive. The plan to adopt a second child was interrupted by surprise pregnancies — first with Delanie, now 12, and then Owen, now 8. Even then, fostering was on their radar.
They moved from California to Edmonds in 2021 to be closer to Jason’s brother and his family. A lower cost of living and competitive pay for teachers in the area allowed Jason to leave his job as a youth pastor to be a stay-at-home dad while Abby continued her work as a special education teacher.
Jason’s ability to stay home has helped the family better meet the demands of fostering.
“If we were both working, I think we might have quit [fostering] already,” Jason says.
A season of change
The family’s first placement was 1-month-old Alex, now 2. The first week was a haze of feedings, diaper changes, and interrupted sleep. Jason fielded endless phone calls scheduling medical appointments, social worker visits, and check-ins with Olive Crest, the agency that arranged the foster placement. (Note: To protect children’s privacy we are not using their real names in this article).
After 7 ½ months with the Lows, Alex went back to his mom, freeing the Lows up to receive Paul, now 3. But six months later, Alex returned to the Lows, where he and Paul have been since June 2024.
“I can’t count how many times people have said to us, ‘I could never do it,’ meaning the emotional rollercoaster of loving a child as your own and then having to say goodbye,” Jason says. “I think of the emotional and spiritual suffering that [Jesus] endured for our sake, and I think we see it similarly, where we’re carrying a lot of the burdens and trauma that [the kids] suffered. We’re not necessarily trying to cushion them from it, but love them in the midst of their trauma.
“Their story might end really poorly … and we may feel it’s unjust and makes us angry,” Jason adds, “but my faith will be what has to carry me through that.”
Fostering support and generosity
Strong connections with family, neighbors, their church, and respite care families have given the Lows an invaluable village. This is essential as they tend to Alex’s medical conditions that require daily support and many doctor appointments, and Paul’s behavioral and emotional issues.
Balancing the older kids’ needs is also an ongoing challenge.
Occasionally, one parent will stay home with napping littles, while the other takes the older kids out. At home, the foster kids mostly spend time upstairs where their bedrooms and common areas are, while the older ones can retreat to their space downstairs.
Yet even with this tension of multiple needs, the Lows’ children have fully embraced the toddlers.
“Whenever I need help, and if Jason is gone, Micah is like, ‘I got you, mom,’” Abby says. “It warms my heart because I know they annoy him, and he doesn’t get to do the things that he wants to do.”
Owen says while the littles’ activity level is frustrating, he enjoys always having someone to play with. Micah has similar sentiments. “When they cry and have tantrums, it’s a bit much. But they’re cool, they’re fun,” he says.
When asked about advice for other foster families, Delanie is quick to respond, “Be patient because [the kids] have been through a lot, and they’re in a new environment — and they don’t know very much, especially if they’re younger.”
Jason said most days require a team effort because of the toddlers’ immense needs.
“But all three of our kids have seen the need and joined the effort,” he says. “If our kids get to adulthood and look back on this experience, and it has helped them to be more selfless, that’s one of the things we really want from this.”
This article is one piece of our special series on foster and kinship care, highlighting the voices and experiences of foster youth, caregivers, and communities supporting them. Explore the full series to read more of these important stories.
Unsung Heroes: Caring for kids who aren’t their own | Across Washington, tens of thousands of kids are being raised by grandparents, aunts, uncles, and other relatives — often without formal foster care support. As the state prioritizes keeping families together, kinship caregivers are filling the gap, frequently at great personal cost. Explore how policy shifts, community programs, and grassroots resilience are changing the face of caregiving and the future for these children.
Treehouse builds brighter futures for foster kids in Washington | What happens when foster youth are met not with barriers, but with opportunity and support? Treehouse has spent decades answering that question — and changing lives in the process. As this one-of-a-kind program faces major funding cuts, its mission has never been more urgent.
Paying It Forward: A former foster youth gives back | Kyle Martinez grew up in the foster care system, unsure of what his future might hold. Today, he’s using that experience to uplift others — mentoring youth in care and speaking out for stronger support systems. His journey from uncertainty to advocacy shows the impact one person can make when given the tools to thrive.
How we became licensed foster parents in Washington | One family’s year-long journey to become a licensed foster parent — filled with paperwork, training, and plenty of heart — offers a firsthand look at the process. From orientation to their first placement, their story sheds light on the realities of stepping into foster care.
